Energy and a positive lifestyle is essential for a happy life. Unfortunately a lot of us when in a relationship, don't pay attention to how much energy we need to put in order to make our partner happy and satisfied. Let me give an example. If you wake up every morning and your partner has “the face”, I call it the face because you already know that expression. He has it every morning or maybe every evening. I am not talking about once in a while, we can have bad days sometimes which can lead to a bad attitude. I am talking about a situation where almost every day your partner will have that attitude that will require you to put so much energy towards him. Yes you don’t have to put that energy, yes you can ignore but his energy affects your energy. It is just not fun to hang around someone that seems to be upset so much, so most of the time we put that energy trying to make our partner feel better.
The question to ask is why? Why does your partner seem to have low energy almost every day?
He doesn’t!
As human beings we find ways to get the things we want. A child will cry so he can get what he wants. Guess what, your partner can do the same. Your partner realizes how much energy and attention you are giving him when he is constantly upset so he keeps doing that.
Usually the cause for this behavior in the first place will be insecurity. If your partner is insecure in the relationship, or in your feelings towards him he will constantly ask for reassurance. We need to remember that constantly asking for reassurance in a relationship isn't healthy and can lead to trust issues, which is a whole different subject.
My suggestion in cases where you feel tired from putting so much energy in trying to make your partner happier is to talk about the things first. There is nothing wrong with saying: “hey I feel like you are sad/ upset most of the time and it is affecting my energy level. It will take our relationship too much higher if you will try to be happier and look at the positive things you have in life every day”. Sometimes we just need someone to remind us that even though our life isn’t perfect we still have a good life, we are healthy, we have a job, we have a roof over our head and we have people who care about us. The thing is that you need to pay attention if a change happened or not. If there is no change and you just keep putting most of your energy towards your partner, not a lot of energy will be left for yourself. I don’t want you to find yourself in that position or to keep staying in that situation, so if a change won’t arrive that will be your sign.
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